NEXT!

My November scan showed that my tumors had again responded unevenly to chemo.   I'm disappointed for several reasons, including that the drug I was on, Navelbine, was a manageable one.   I felt "off" 2-3 days a week and got tired more easily, but nothing like my first experience with chemo.  I was giving myself Neupogen shots to increase my white blood cell count, but I've been doing that long enough that it didn't bother me.

I'm now on my 4th "new" treatment since May.   To review:  Arimidex (oral hormone treatment), Xeloda (oral chemo), Navelbine (I.V. chemo) and now Cytoxan.   Cytoxan is another oral chemo, which makes things a little easier.  It's processed through the bladder,  so I'm supposed to drink 10-12 cups of water every day (to avoid irritation....).  I haven't hit that goal very often, but I'm close enough that the side effects don't bother me very much.   I'm more tired (of course) and my white cell count has dropped, but so far I don't need Neupogen shots.   My hair has started to thin, but its not too noticeable (except to me!).  I'm hoping that my hair "only" thins, but its possible I'll lose enough to buy a wig.   Time will tell. 

For some reason, this "failure" hit me pretty hard.  First of all, I wanted the Navelbine to work so I would finally be on my way to finishing treatment.  I've been on some form of treatment since May, and every 3 months I "start over" with a new drug, so I feel like I haven't made any progress (although hopefully the drugs that didn't work on the stubborn tumors are helping to keep the others at bay longer).   It's also in the back of my mind that each time a treatment doesn't work,  I'm one step closer to the tumors not being so small, or worse, more tumors joining them.  I trust Dr. Kaplan, who said this isn't a "medical emergency", but he strongly hinted that if my current treatment doesn't work, he might not give me a choice next time, which means I'll have to go back to Abraxane (yuck).

My next scan will be in mid-February.  Until then, I'm drinking lots of water and hoping for the best.  I'm thankful that I was able to get through the holidays and the boys' birthday with a relatively easy treatment.  Let's see what the rest of the year brings!